Friday, February 26, 2016

Scientific Evidence That You're Magical! :)

It never fails to amaze me that we are all made of stardust. Its so beautiful and empowering. :)
(If nothing, read the part in italics)

How much of the human body is made up of stardust?

The early universe expanded after the big bang for only 3 seconds before it cooled to a state where subatomic particles assembled into atoms. Hydrogen atoms formed first since they are the simplest type of atom. Hydrogen atoms contain only one proton in its nucleus which makes it number one on the periodic table of elements. After the universe aged a little (roughly 300 million years) the hydrogen atoms started to clump together under the force of gravity. As these clumps grew in size, the pressure at the center grew larger. When the temperature reached 15 million degrees F, the pressure caused the hydrogen to fuse their nuclei together. This process is known as nuclear fusion. The positively charged nuclei naturally repel each other. However under high temperatures and pressure, the nuclei are moving fast enough to smash together and fuse. When the two proton nuclei of the hydrogen atoms fuse, they form a nucleus consisting of two protons. Some electrons also combine with protons to form neutrons and neutrinos. These neutrons also bind to the nucleus helping it to remain more stable under the nuclear forces. An atom with two protons in its nucleus is Helium. That’s why helium is number two on the periodic table of elements. The fusion process also releases a lot of energy in which some of the hydrogen mass converts into light energy. This conversion of mass in to energy uses Einstein’s famous equation: E=mc2.

At this point, our universe has a bunch of large clumps of hydrogen fusing together to create helium while releasing large amounts of light. This is what we commonly call a star! In fact our sun is doing this right now as we speak (or read). As a star ages, it then fuses the helium with hydrogen to form lithium which has three protons in its nucleus. Take a look at the periodic table to see which number it is. This fusion process continues to create larger and larger nuclei. The forth, the fifth and all the way up to 26.

This is the general idea but it’s not exactly this easy. We have to remember that this is in fact nuclear physics that we’re dealing with here. It looks like a pretty simple picture as we just described but up close it is actually an intricate jigsaw puzzle.

The fusion process doesn’t actually create the elements in order through the periodic table. In fact, the process jumps around. And some fused nuclei decay down to lower elements that were skipped over. Fusion also creates neutrons which combine with atoms to create isotopes which act like atomic cousins. Overall, we can say that a star produces all of the elements up to iron in the periodic table through the fusion process. The details of this process are fascinating, yet they deter us from answering the question at hand.

The element with 26 protons in its nucleus is iron. It turns out that this is the last element that is created. To create higher elements, fusion requires more energy than it produces. We mentioned earlier that a star glows because the fusing atoms release energy (E=mc2). However, the amount of energy released becomes smaller and smaller as the atoms grow larger. Eventually at iron, there is no energy released at all. And for elements beyond iron more energy is need for fusion than gravitational pressure can provide.

After a star has created enough iron, fusion ceases and the hot burning core begins to cool. Up until this point the hot core of the star erupting outwards and preventing gravity from collapsing the star. Now that the star has cooled, the core no longer expands and gravity quickly collapses the star. The star implodes with enough energy to immediately fuse some of the atoms into higher elements like Nickel, Krypton, Gold, Uranium,… etc. This quick and violent implosion releases an enormous amount of energy that explodes the star. This is what we call a supernova! Astrophysicists are still not exactly certain about the details of how a supernova explodes. Hopefully you can figure it out someday!

The exploded remains from a supernova travel through out the universe only to someday clump together with other stardust and give birth to a new star. This is the life of our universe.

Now that we have established that every element in the periodic table aside from hydrogen is essentially stardust, we have to determine how much of our body is made up of this stardust. If we know how many hydrogen atoms are in our body, then we can say that the rest is stardust. Our body is composed of roughly 7x1027 atoms. That is a lot of atoms! Try writing that number out on a piece of paper: 7 with 27 zeros behind it. We say roughly because if you pluck a hair or pick your nose there might be slightly less. Now it turns out that of those billion billion billion atoms, 4.2x1027 of them are hydrogen. Remember that hydrogen is bigbang dust and not stardust. This leaves 2.8x1027 atoms of stardust. Thus the amount of stardust atoms in our body is 40%.

Since stardust atoms are the heavier elements, the percentage of star mass in our body is much more impressive. Most of the hydrogen in our body floats around in the form of water. The human body is about 60% water and hydrogen only accounts for 11% of that water mass. Even though water consists of two hydrogen atoms for every oxygen, hydrogen has much less mass. We can conclude that 93% of the mass in our body is stardust. Just think, long ago someone may have wished upon a star that you are made of.


Two Ways :)

How it works two ways
It either makes or breaks

Perfumed flowers rot and withered away giving stench
Warm embraces became sensations of strangulation
Whispered longings became nags
Promises became burdens holding them back
Everything got lost in the distance
When she saw the sun, he was seeing the stars
She seemed to be walking on a tightrope with silence being the staff that let her keep her centre of balance

Perfumed flowers became memories to be preserved between the pages
Warm embraces became layers of strong protection
Whispered longings turned the soul desperate for the flesh and the bone
Promises just a confirmation that nothing could go wrong no matter what
The distance just another dimension that time would end
The sun would visit daily and take her messages as he went along, the moon took her songs through the wind and delivered them to him
If they were separated by seven seas, there was no other distance she could cross more easily

PS -This was lying incomplete somewhere and as I tried to finish it, I realized that the original was supposed to be longer but my memory doesn't serve me well and I don't remember the lines anymore. :/ 

Monday, February 22, 2016

The Perks of Being a Girl with Straightened Hair, News, Movies and Other Conflicting/Non-Conflicting Things.

I have wished to have an ambiguous title like this for so long! So fancy. Like I was writing a book on something.

For the first part - the perks of being a girl yada yada.
So, there I was in the train sitting and doing my business. This guy waits for my mom to get down at the Tatanagar station and then chats me up till the Howrah station. Takes out a Gujju connection. Offers me a ride till home; says he is going in the same direction. Now mind you they are already four people. A cab takes a maximum of four people. So I refuse twice, thrice. Then I just let it be hoping that someone in his family would see some sense and be like bro, sorry, we're housefull and you idiot boy stop promising rides to girls in trains, at least not when your family is around. Even that doesn't happen! Not even after I asked his whole family whether they were sure about it. The uncle says he would get off at a distance of just 5 minutes from the station so it won't be a bother to anyone. Then we go to the cab stand and even the police force volunteers didn't stop us. Which is weird. They NEVER allow five people and a police person is always there. My final exit plan was that the driver would ask us to pay extra as he was breaking rules and then I would be the good person and be like no, the bus is okay for me. Ya, you guessed it, the driver didn't ask for extra money! So there I was stuck so awkwardly between his two sisters who obviously didn't want tot talk that much and him next to the driver, all of us super quiet. Their house came before mine and they started pulling out their luggage and things. I breathed a sigh of relief and spread out my stuff on the taxi seat. But oh no, the story doesn't end there. He left his sisters at their doorstep and comes back inside!! That he would drop me till home. I told him he doesn't have to do that, he would have to come back all the way. He does it anyway. Now even though I got creeped out in the beginning, I just adopted an oh-well-whatever attitude about it. This wasn't particularly unsafe because he knows just the road to my house - you have to turn into smaller bylanes to reach my exact residence. In fact, I know his exact address which means I can send the police there in case something happens. Plus, I have had no contact with that day except when I bumped into him at the mall. And his sister as well (on some other day but ya, this might happen a lot what with our areas being close by).
I have travelled in trains a lot and this has never happened to me before. The only thing that changed was my hair and nails. In short, if you look a little bit groomed, you get dropped home for free. Meh. :P

Its been so disheartening to read the newspapers lately. All they consist of are fights, wars, rapes and murders. No, literally. There have been times when I have given up on newspapers because I just couldn't take the negativity floating around anymore. It was the day they'd reported about a doctor whose kidneys had failed and was on dialysis because a bunch of people just beat him up as a person had died under his care. It was apparently not even the doctors fault. He had asked the patient to take some tests which the patient had ignored to take.
There is this whole JNU controversy and the Jats wanting reservation thingy. I read up on the JNU thing because at first I couldn't understand what was happening. Now, I won't put up my views here because I do not even want to talk about who is right or who is wrong. Plus, I have heard people being branded as traitors for weirder reasons (which I can't talk about here).
I want to talk about hate. No matter how much you disagree with the other person, how can you hate him enough to physically hurt him that much? In this JNU thing, the student body leader was beaten up twice in the court premises. An opposition party worker was beat up by an MLA. It has made me think that we are just animals inside actually putting on the garb of decency. When given an appropriate time, some leverage and power, we will not hesitate leading even mobs to kill people. Sorry, but I think that such viciousness is not a result of disagreement, its more like a lack of humanity.
Even their words are no less bitter. [Case in point -]
Just finished with a newspaper that quoted some protester saying that they wanted to burn that young student body leader just like his Hindu group had burnt alive an Australian *missionary* and his two sons in the past!! How can you want to say such things? How can you then proceed to execute such threats for the lamest of reasons? Like.. let me kill him because he *might* be eating something I don't like or let me kill him because he doesn't subscribe to my faith. How!?
Like how my friend said why is brute strength so appealing so us?
Somewhere, I think people forget that others are humans too. That they are spreading hate and pain . They must be getting some kind of pleasure out of it because such brutal acts seem impossible to commit. That's someone's life you are taking - his family, his dreams, his hopes - all gone with the pull of the trigger. We have forgotten what a life means.

I saw the movie Neerja yesterday. And its so good! I don't have that kind of bravery at all. I think we need more movies like this. Specially the fact that it has a female heroine. I imagine young girls specially getting so inspired by it. To clarify, all children will get inspired but lately, I have seen so many item songs with women doing nothing but looking pretty or serials with women in traditional gender biased roles (maybe it has always been there and it is me who started noticing it now or has it become more explicit, I don't know), I think this has become a little bit necessary. Media is something we are exposed to everyday and its high time it does more to expand our horizons. I myself was a little bit surprised when I saw 'A Man's World' series on YouTube. I knew what I was getting into - it is a web series about a man who complains about how easy the women have it and then some magic happens and yes, he still is a man, but in a world that is matriarchal. I was surprised about the scene when he is shown commuting for the first time after this reversal. The roads were full of women. Bus commuters, auto drivers, lorry drivers, pedestrians, roadside stall vendors, everyone. That made me realize how used to I am to seeing men in such roles that any other way hadn't occurred to me at all. I started wondering why I had never seen women puchka sellers around. Its food and even traditionally, that has been a woman's job. I guess it probably has to do with lugging around the puchka carts. Or taking care of the family at home. Either way, I don't know. There should be more of us around though. Haha.
Even Airlift was good. Both of these were based on real life incidents.
In continuation to my news subhead content, both of them showed in a way how men have actually become a little bit immune to killing (it is all around us, its true. :/). A gun in hand and bam and bam. [Fun Fact : According to Jainism, when you're seeing a movie and you then root for the hero to kill the villain, you get 'paap on your head'. Hehe. :D]
But though seriously. Airlift was about Saddam Hussein taking over Kuwait, for basically.. money!? So ya. Their reality changed overnight. Fine they did live in labour camps and all but imagine how scary it is that you're sleeping one night and the next you have no control, no ownership rights, no nothing. Your neighbouring country deciding to bring in some tanks and guns and cannons and everything you've ever. ever known is in danger of ruination. To think it has happened to so many people!!

Other Things
In a conversation with my brother yesterday, he remarked how I was growing up and how he was used to the tiny me. And it saddened me somewhere. It made me want to go back for a second to when I was so protected and sheltered and when I sat and complained about my very-very-important-lol-not-really issues to him. I do still complain sometimes but how the nature of complaints have changed. How time alters the way we behave. Wanted to go back to tiny Khushi again. *sigh*

Finally did get the hang of the meaning of 'Wildest Dreams' song. Thanks to Shristi for sowing the seeds in my mind. I do not know how to explain but I am getting a little bit better at guessing why people feel the way they do. A teensy bit. Will it help control my impatience with such things and cultivate a little bit of indifference so that I don't react? Let's see.
2% mush might have gotten into me from everywhere else. Since I am not allowed to say undignified things, I started reading Divergent fanfiction and well, the story I had picked was so bad and disappointing. Tch tch.

And just imagine, bhaiya ironed my clothes for me. I also have a really bad coughing fit thing going on. All these guys make sure I have haldi milk, haldi water (twice a day) and cough syrup three times a day. Cuteness! :)

I am also a participant in a chain email thing to send nice passages/poems/quotes anything. Basically, it is about spreading good vibes. Even to strangers. I can even see my mom getting a little bit uplifted by reading nice things. She is quite sick right now. :(
All in all, it is a good exercise. If I get the time, and also replies, I want to post some here. Let's see. :)

There is some drama going on in Delhi as well. My prayers with my family. :)

Also, my exams are coming up. Yes, should study. No, I am not.
But all of this was so good to get off my chest! Cheers. :D

Tuesday, February 16, 2016

The People Diaries - 3! :D

Apurva Ramani
The girl with zero ounces of lie in her body. Thus, you never leave the house looking ugly. She says what she thinks and what she isn't saying.. She will say eventually! Haha. One of the most honest and contemplative people I've ever known with a super active mind - the mind that always finds its way back to its favourite topics and smashes them, crushes them and tramples them through the process of overthinking. Being artistically talented she will make birthday cards for you. Then scrap them because they're ugly. And end up making even perfecter ones, incorporating all these ideas that swim in her head, just before the stroke of midnight.
Presenting Apurva - the procrastinator occasionally chasing perfectionism!

How would you describe yourself? Give 3 words if that's easier.
Nice. Chashmish. Lazy.

Wears glasses.

(A/N - Thanks for that. Would have never ever ever guessed. So full of surprises you are. I like your non-obviousness a lot! ^_^)

I know that! Like you use it as a word to describe yourself? That's what I mean.
Yes.. I think it pretty much says a lot about me.

In what way?
Appearance-wise. I've been wearing glasses since I was five. It is a part of my appearance. Most people I know will take a minute to recognize me without it.

What do you want your story to say?
You don't have to top the class to win in life!!

Any song or story that holds a special meaning to you? And why?
I cry every time I listen to Little Talks of Little Monsters and Men. The background of the song is about a lady who has gone crazy after her husband's death. She starts hearing voices and cannot sleep. And in the chorus, the husband tries to calm her down and consoles her by saying that he misses their little talks. The lyrics aren't couple specific though. So I imagine losing my way when I'm separated from my Dad.

Your greatest assets?
My derriere.

What's that one thing that pisses you off a lot?
People talking to me in an authoritative manner.

One virtue or skill you wish you had?
I wish I were competitive enough.

In small things or do you mean in the long run ambitious way?
In small and big things. I definitely have the talent and the potential to get ahead but I lack something to drive me to do it.

Quotes/thoughts you live by?
Live life KING size.

One question you wished someone asked you?
Can't think of any.

One thing you want but would never say?
I want to be drop dead gorgeous.

What is the one thing you wished people knew about you?
I wish people knew that I am going to be their 'it' person. So that they stop picking me second.

What excuse do you use the most?
In terms of?

Umm maybe to get others to do your work for you or the excuse you give yourself for not doing something you really wanted to?
"I don't need to prove anything to anyone."

Your dream?
To earn money. Loads of it. And then spend it on Barbie dolls.

Where do you see yourself in ten years?
Bossing around in some private bank because it pays well.

When did you think you were growing up? What realization made you feel that way?
When I started being wise about spending money. And when I realized it was okay sometimes to not have it your way if you can avoid a fight at home.

Your biiigest fear?

Its not that!
Oh wait. Seeing ghosts! Because then I will tell everyone and they won't believe me and put me in a mental asylum.

Top of your bucket list?
Pay off debts.

What is reaaally important to you?
That I play a part in shaping someone's life and give back to the world.

Reason for getting up in the morning?
Mom is heavily bent on following a routine. I don't have a choice.

(A/N - Lololololololololol.)

Money no object, if you could be anything in the world, what would you be?
I would be a personal shopper at Barneys, New York.

What do you value most in a person?

And last, something you never ever want to forget?
I never want to forget the voices of my loved ones. I do not remember my birth mother's voice so I cannot imagine her saying anything to me.

Record and keep.
Yes already thought of that.

(A/N - The full picture of how honesty works. So I ask her after this how the whole interview was. And she ends up saying how safe and non intrusive it was, how dark and dirty is what people liked to read and nope, she wouldn't answer any more questions for me. :P)

Saturday, February 13, 2016

Favourites' Engagement! :D

So today (technically yesterday, i.e, 12.02.2016) was my favourite brothers engagement! :D
He is too adorable and he doesn't know that he is my favourite and I am not his favourite, for sure. Damn. :/
But when the ceremony was going on and they were given the rings, bhaiya instantly got down to his knee and then kissed her side forehead. It was so cute! The bride was kind of like stopppp! :P
Other than that too, he is so full of manners and other gentlemanly things and knows how to have fun and is also funny and he is just perfect! :D

Also, Mumbai.
You know its a good city when two strangers help you by themselves.
So, I was looking for the McDonald's outside Andheri local train station. The lady I asked didn't know about it and another lady came forward by herself to direct me!
Then we were cabbing it somewhere. A vegetable seller signalled to me to shut the cab door again as it wasn't shut properly! :)
The buildings here are huge. 0 points to Kolkata on skyscrapers.
They have Ashok Leyland buses here. Red BST buses. Flat fronts.
Kolkata has Tata buses. At least the front is different. :P
Oh and a lot lot lot of mutual fund ads here!

I should write more often. My thoughts get lost otherwise. Ohhooo.
Rhea gave me the most thoughtful gift ever! :)))
Also too sleepy now.
Congrats to bhaiya and Surbhi. God bless you and keep you very very happy always! ^_^

Love. <3 :)

Tuesday, February 9, 2016

Last Day of College - 09.02.2016.

So.. This is officially the end of three years. Three whole years. It scares me to death.
Its a big thing. One whose magnitude I didn't realize. Because these three years have been about so much more than education. In fact, they've been about education the least. They have been about life. About people. About values. About turmoil. About struggles. About gratitude. About myself.
Three years ago I was this stupid naïve girl who wanted to cry at orientation day because everyone knew everyone and there couldn't have been anything suckier.
Now I leave a lot, lot richer. With so much learnt.
My interest doesn't interest me anymore. Subject wise.
The middle year and a half actually was insane. I do not know what that was about. And like a meltdown causes averse economic conditions for quite some time, so did this phase.
The thing is.. I will never be able to fully tell people how much I love them. How I really feel for them deep beneath. They are all so beautiful. And maybe I should make my peace with that too.
The scary part isnt that you won't meet nice people. That's a lie. Maybe in fewer numbers, but I believe good people will turn up. The sad part is that those people won't be them.

I can't believe its time to say goodbye.
I can't say goodbye.

Monday, February 8, 2016

Anger Doesn't Cut Anger

Sometimes, when anyone is angry with me, my instant reaction is to be angry back at them. Or even get angry at their reason for being angry or feeling upset for a stupid reason. But its so silly! Anger never cuts anger. All people want is to be understood. And if not understood, why stress yourself out? Leave people's issues with them. Learn to lessen the load. Leave things upto them to figure out. You have enough on your hands.
I kind of shouted at some of my friends today. 2 days to college left. I shouldn't have. But the difference is in what they thought was fun and what I saw it as. What I heard in what they said. Sometimes.. What I keep hearing. I could never have explained it. One day perhaps they'll know. It's on me, this one. They are good people and they understand even when I fake emoticons! That's enough, isn't it?

And everybody, seriously everybody needs to stop stressing.
Stop telling yourself that you have to work constantly. Stop planning way ahead.
All it does is make you crazy.
Just.. let go.
Your shoulders will thank you.

Thank you God for everything.
Bless everyone.

Good Night :D

Sunday, February 7, 2016

Nothing's Ever Going To Feel Like Home.

After shifting for the fourth time you realize some hard truths about life. Like how, no matter what, nothings going to feel like home.
After a point its probably best to stop talking about it because all people are wonderful and welcoming but yet there seems to be this problem, no matter where you go.
Alone is the best I can ask for.
Farewell is coming up.
So is my cousins engagement.
Means dressing up.
2 saris in a span of a week.
Scares the shit out of me.

Tuesday, February 2, 2016

Fourth Place in Three Years!

So, I left my paying guest place on 31st of January and came to my bua's place. As the title says, this is the fourth place I have come to in three years! Shifting is still annoying but its less so. And yes, you start to keep only the important things with you when you've had to move a lot. But this time when I was shifting, there was this sense of an ending. It's all coming to an end, no? All the other people coming up to me to discuss the old times, telling me it was good to be around.. Such a weird feeling inside.
Anyway, don't have time to dwell on it now. Got to work on my term paper. Change its face. Filled out the application of Teach for India. Unpacked.
Also, won the second prize in three legged race. It has been my childhood dream to place in that race. In school I had come in fourth at this race even though we did so well in the heats. Last year as well, we were good to come in first while practising but then the ribbon broke and we couldn't do it. This time, it was different. :D
And the weird dreams I have had today!
Feeling extremely lazy and sleepy in life. Will add all I want to, later.

Eeeee :D