Sunday, February 15, 2015

Honesty

I wonder what makes honesty so tough.
Why is it so easy to lie to leave alone others, but to yourself? But if yourself, you cannot hide if you listen. You eventually understand your lies are just a cover.
Maybe because sometimes the truth is so hard you learn to repress it. So, if you lie to yourself enough, every time the thought comes up, the truth would get reduced to a shred.
You stop being honest with yourself so that every thing becomes less real. Like if you don't say it, don't admit it, it didn't happen. You hope to change history.
You lie to seem updated, to seem smart, to seem like you are one of them. You lie because maybe the truth is just too embarrassing.
Sometimes you lie to protect others. Sometimes to protect yourself from others.
And if you feel like people will not understand at all, you don't even bother to be honest.
Is honesty like a chink in the armor? Like being honest is a sign of weakness? Has revealing yourself truly, with all your strengths and weaknesses, been reduced to a form of submission?
When people see you in that new light do they end up feeling different about you?
Are you then, actually pushing them away?

Honesty is good. But lying is easier.
Honesty is acceptance. Honesty is letting yourself go. Honesty is an understanding to change for the better or satisfaction with the same. Honesty is a step towards healing.
For how long could run? Until you are spent and burnt? How long could you hide, could you escape? Escaping by avoiding is like sticking your head under the sand. Its simply no good.
Endeavour to be honest.

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